Gift giving is my love language, what’s yours?
I keep a running list on my phone:
- Pomegranate arils
- Dutch Bros blended aftershock rebel
- Brown blush Maybelline lipstick
My phone’s notes app is brimming with oddly particular items like these, coalescing in my “gift lists”. These lists are for my loved ones where I document all their favorite items: childhood snacks, drink orders, lipstick shades, etc. Either from them referencing these items in passing or seeing them contemplate a purchase, I add to their personalized list. These lists are my roadmaps for how best to love the people in my life.
When my best friend mentions loving Nerds gummy clusters because they remind her of her dad, I jot it down. Knowing her dad leaves town often for work, I always punctuate his absence by buying her some when I know she’s missing him.
At Target, my mother eyes nail polish in the shade “Vintage Pink” but insists she doesn’t need it despite how longingly she looks at it, so I make note of it. Then, Christmas morning, joy enlivens her face as she unexpectedly draws it from her stocking and subsequently hastens to paint her nails with it.
My cousin has a hard week of tests ahead, so I drop off her favorite drink I have recorded: an iced pumpkin spice chai latte, one pump of vanilla syrup. The caffeine and sugar accompany her during her arduous study sessions.
These gift lists are my way of acknowledging my loved ones, though the value does not truly lie in the material item. I endeavor to show my loved ones that I perceive their unspoken thoughts and remember their esoteric stories to make them feel deeply seen.
Gift giving is my love language not because I value possessions, but because it is the language through which I speak all the little things I remember.
To know someone is to love them, but to remember them is to love them over and over again.
Anya Kennedy is a 12th grader at Jesuit High School. She enjoys spending time with friends and family, traveling, swimming, hiking, and reading. She enjoys working at a preschool, tutoring, and babysitting.
